Morbid Mondays Bs Pre Show Rasputin

Our second pre-show! This is our warmup to talking about morbid stuff for a couple of hours. Sometimes you have to get the jitters out. 

Join our ko-fi! Your money will now be given to the imp that rattles the chains at the start of this show. It's hard work and he appreciates your kindness. https://ko-fi.com/morbidmondays

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

I don't know. It's um something's wrong with me. I gotta plug in a thing so it we quit having an echo.

SPEAKER_00 0:06

There are there are many things wrong with both of us.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

Yeah. You've you've spent um oh yeah. Welcome to the pre-show. Hi, yes. Hello. It's a thing. We're here. Why did you stop recording? Yeah, my my thing's going crazy. Um there we go. Alright, now we're good.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Yay!

SPEAKER_01 0:26

Now we're good. Uh yeah, you were telling me about uh I am a sadist, a second at masochist.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

A masochist.

SPEAKER_01 0:33

A masochist.

SPEAKER_00 0:34

You're over here drinking muddy matcha, like just like foamy. Like a tablespoon of matcha and like two ounces of water.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

Two tablespoons.

SPEAKER_00 0:42

You're insane.

SPEAKER_01 0:43

And one cup of water. Mix it around, and then I might I might add some more because just to make it thinner and drinkable. Because it is like powerful. Powerful. And and only steeped the water only hot enough to be like smoking.

SPEAKER_00 1:00

I can't Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:02

It's gotta be it's gotta be below boiling or it gets really bitter.

SPEAKER_00 1:06

I know.

SPEAKER_01 1:06

Yeah. So that, and then I I do add a ton of heavy whipping cream to it.

SPEAKER_00 1:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:12

So it's not it's not just I will drink it just green foam.

SPEAKER_00 1:15

But like insane.

SPEAKER_01 1:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:17

Do you have the little bamboo whisk too, or do you shake yours?

SPEAKER_01 1:20

There's no way to do it without the wheel. Like I have a I have I've got the little cream maker.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

We've had this conversation before with the electronic frother.

SPEAKER_01 1:27

Yeah, it is just not as good. Right. Yeah. There's I don't think you can improve further than the bamboo whisk. Yeah, outside of an engineer making a a piece of machinery that just does this. But the problem is even there, it's by eye, right? Like I use a heavier, like earthier matcha powder, so I am looking for the foam. Yeah. So I'm like whisking until I get foam, and then if that doesn't happen, I've done something wrong. So like I'm like, oh okay, what's I can't, it it has to be by hand, and it's gotta be with the whisk. Why is you're so strong? Because I I also though drink like pour over coffee and uh strong. Like I use a mocha sometimes. I had a mocha, then I ruined it. Yeah, it got I left water in it for a really long time and it got corroded on the inside, and it was like, well, there's not really a way for me to like polish this off.

SPEAKER_00 2:27

You would need like a drill bit with like a long head and a yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:32

Or like dunk it in acid for a long time, and you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 2:36

You're never gonna get that taste back out.

SPEAKER_01 2:38

No, and you and basically you might as well just start with a new one. Yeah. Because what how you would clean it is it will take all the seasoning out of it. So it's because I got a good one, right? I guess that's it.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

It's crazy how many instruments that we we season. Yeah. Fucking mocahete, uh anything cast iron.

SPEAKER_01 2:58

Yeah. I've got my little I have my pot for specifically for hot chocolate.

SPEAKER_00 3:03

Come on.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Yeah. Yeah. With the with the wooden, because it there's nothing better than that. Like people that the best hot chocolate is made with the Aztec tool that's been around forever.

SPEAKER_00 3:14

Hang on. I have to, I I have to mention, possibly flex a little bit. I'm not really sure how. I watch, I watch, um there's a YouTube channel that's got a bunch of British dudes on it that they occasionally will do these like guessing uh kitchen instrument games.

SPEAKER_01 3:31

Okay. Oh, where they have like here's the weird Korean or Japanese cooking thing.

SPEAKER_00 3:36

Just any anywhere in the world, anywhere in the world. Or they'll occasionally do like fake kitchen instruments. Like Tony and I were watching the other. I just name dropped my partner.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Oh well.

SPEAKER_00 3:46

Anyway.

SPEAKER_01 3:46

For the first time. You did it a couple of times.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

First time I've caught it. Anyway, Tony and I were watching the other day, and they were like, This kitchen tool is designed to scrape all the flesh out of a watermelon and give you nice clean slices. And I was like, that is not a kitchen instrument, that's a horse brush.

SPEAKER_01 4:02

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 4:02

You are lying.

SPEAKER_01 4:03

Like a curry comb?

SPEAKER_00 4:05

I I'll show you actually.

SPEAKER_01 4:06

Um like the sawtooth.

SPEAKER_00 4:08

It's one of the um it's one of the round ones that's designed to pull shed off.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

Yeah. Jeez, okay. And they were Oh, they're coming up with like what they think it is.

SPEAKER_00 4:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:19

Like the this old house, what's this tool for kind of no, not that one.

SPEAKER_00 4:23

That's wooden.

SPEAKER_01 4:24

I like I like watching those. It's very rare that I know what the fuck is going on.

SPEAKER_00 4:29

Um, but we I I this this this it's this. It is a curry brush. You were correct.

SPEAKER_01 4:35

Yeah. Because we have a tiny one for our cat.

SPEAKER_00 4:37

Bam. Yeah. Is that thing?

SPEAKER_01 4:38

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

And uh they they handed it over to them, and Tony and I both looked at it, looked at each other, looked back at the TV, and like he was uh he was a half step ahead of me from saying he's like, that's a horse brush. And I was like, Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

Yeah, yes, because this one's this one for for listeners that looks different because it's got like three rings. The one that you would use for a dog or a cat has one.

SPEAKER_00 4:58

And it's it is a it is a a a handled tool that is round and it has like these uh serrated teeth on it. Yeah, they're not sharp.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

They almost it almost looks like a bear trap.

SPEAKER_00 5:10

A little a little bit, yeah, except it doesn't like spring or snap or anything, but it usually for a horse usually has three or four rings of this, and they're in um descending size towards the center, and it's it's designed to pull the shed off a horse. Uh because I don't for those that aren't in equine anything, uh, their coats can get very, very, very dense and very impacted. Um, and it's just uncomfortable for the horse. We are farm people.

SPEAKER_01 5:38

Yeah. Um but snow dogs are like this. Like huskies are like this. You have to curry comb their fur because their undercoat gets super thick.

SPEAKER_00 5:45

So yeah, anyway. But yeah, they they'll they'll do shit like that. Hang on, I'm tracking the conversation back. How did I get here?

SPEAKER_01 5:51

We started with matcha tea.

SPEAKER_00 5:53

How did we get to the fucking kitchen gadgets?

SPEAKER_01 5:57

Oh, because we were talking about hot chocolate? Yes. And then you said I'm gonna flex a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 6:01

Got it, got it, got it, got it. So they were doing one of these episodes. Thank you. I appreciate you. I knew there was a reason we were talking about these guys. And they they they brought out uh they brought out the the whisk. Yeah, wooden whisk for hot chocolate. Oh, with all the rings, yeah, and they had no idea what it was. Like they like they shook it and it was like, this isn't a kitchen instrument, it's it's an instrument.

SPEAKER_01 6:26

Yeah, it's a maraca.

SPEAKER_00 6:27

And I was like, no, that's for hot chocolate, homie.

SPEAKER_01 6:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:30

Bruh. How do you not? And then I realized we live in the south.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

Yeah, we we live very close to the culture that invented them. I bought mine and I think I bought mine. Or no, my mom got it for us because she uh I make a lot of hot chocolate in the winter, and so she got a um uh chocolatera and and one of these um special whisks that I'm forgetting the name of. Right?

SPEAKER_00 6:53

Yeah, I can't think of the name of it either, but like it's the first thing I think of when I'm like hot chocolate time.

SPEAKER_01 6:58

Yeah. Because it's it's like the it's like the bamboo whisk for for tea making, but it gets rid of the grit. Like there's so many moving parts that it actually does mix it up very well. And you it gets rid of a lot of the grit from dried, like you know, cone or dried dried biscuit hot chocolate.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

God, they look so fancy too.

SPEAKER_01 7:18

They are super ornate and I'm sure very difficult to make.

SPEAKER_00 7:22

Molinillo.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

There we go. Um They're beautiful to to circle, I guess. I'm I'm trying to draw from French because mulinette is maybe Yeah. I know very little to no Spanish.

SPEAKER_00 7:39

So I'm like, I've never really thought about the etymology of the word. I'm just it it's the hot chocolate whisk.

SPEAKER_01 7:45

Yeah, it's good, is what it is. Yeah, it's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 7:47

It's perfect. Like there you cannot improve further upon this design. No, especially if you like, you know, drink abuelita.

SPEAKER_01 7:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

Like we do in our house.

SPEAKER_01 7:55

Yeah, because it's the it's the best hot chocolate that you can get cheaply, I should say. Because there's better there's better Mexican style hot chocolate. It's just you have to go find it and or you have to make it yourself. Yeah, and it's it's usually kind of pricey.

SPEAKER_00 8:08

I am not above doing. I have done for D D on several occasions.

SPEAKER_01 8:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:12

Uh put that shit in a crock pot. Let's stay warm. Otherwise it gets turned into this weird like gel.

SPEAKER_01 8:19

Because of all the fats and delicious. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:22

Anyway.

SPEAKER_01 8:23

I can love it. I we whenever we come in contact with people who are not from this area and talk about like because they'll try to drink like the go on the Mexican Isle, and they'll be like candy or hot chocolate, and it'll have spice to it. And they'll be like, Why does it have spice? Because it has spice. It's a little bit of chili powder in there. Yeah, there's like salt and chili powder, and and you know, like oh, very recently a conversation around this actually.

SPEAKER_00 8:50

Somebody picked up a tamarind uh soda, and they were like, What is this? What does it taste like? And I could not describe the flavor.

SPEAKER_01 9:00

It tastes like tamarind. That's what yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:02

There is nothing that tastes like tamarind except tamarind, and I don't know how to explain it to you. Yeah. Because there was also one of the uh the squishy ones.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:10

The the squish candy. Um, I don't, it's it's it's a goop, and it comes in a squish bottle, and it used to be really fun to taste like if a summer melon and an apple had a baby or something. Like there's a like a little bit of caramel in there too, because it's got that like buttery flavor at the back end. Like it's so difficult to explain.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

Some so like yeah, or fatty, fatty candied pear or something like that. Like it's just that is a weird, it's a diff, it's a difficult flavor to pin down.

SPEAKER_00 9:40

What does it taste like, Tamarin? Yeah, no, but what does Tamarin taste like?

SPEAKER_01 9:44

Durian is very similar to that.

SPEAKER_00 9:46

I've never experienced durian.

SPEAKER_01 9:47

It it's not, I don't think it's all it's cracked.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

Or jackfruit for that matter.

SPEAKER_01 9:51

Even though like we're not smelly durian, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:55

I want to try jackfruit too, because like I've seen them in our grocery store a couple of times, and I'm like, I want to try it just to say I've tried it.

SPEAKER_01 10:04

It has a it's kind of like persimmon.

SPEAKER_00 10:06

Like, persimmon's one of those fruits that you just have to experience.

SPEAKER_01 10:09

Yeah, that's true. And then you get one that's like really sour.

SPEAKER_00 10:13

And then it puts you off it forever.

SPEAKER_01 10:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:15

Unless you're a freak like me.

SPEAKER_01 10:16

That was my uh that was my my thing around capers. The first time I had them was on a boat, it was on a cruise, my senior trip. Oh, and there is pizza, there's a giant pizza bar.

SPEAKER_00 10:26

It's so polarizing though, like because if you're not expecting tiny pickle, that's exactly.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

It's like minty and dilly, and it's really in your face. And I had I had never tried anchovy pizza, and they had anchovy and capers.

SPEAKER_00 10:39

Did anybody warn you?

SPEAKER_01 10:41

Well, I knew it was going to be a powerful flavor because it's fatty fish, right? The anchovy was fine.

SPEAKER_00 10:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:47

Anchovy was fine. Like coming from the deep south, right? Fatty fish is normal. Fishy tasting fish is normal.

SPEAKER_00 10:53

Catfish.

SPEAKER_01 10:54

Yeah, catfish, right? So I was like, all right, I kind of like it. It's a little greasy, but on pizza.

SPEAKER_00 10:58

Catfish that is trash fish everywhere else. Yeah. But here it's like $13 a plate.

SPEAKER_01 11:03

Because you because we figured out how to make it, though. It's like oxtails. Oxtails is take up.

SPEAKER_00 11:08

I will fight someone's mother for oxtail.

SPEAKER_01 11:11

It that used to be a cheap food.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Really?

SPEAKER_01 11:13

Well, it's the throwaway cut from a butchered so good because of the marrow and the it makes yeah. Well, that was the thing, is that like a lot of soul food, right? A lot of black southern food is from the stuff that no one else wanted. Or they were allowed to have. Because remember that the like the history of this is that a lot of this food is stuff they either took with them, like rice, right? Rice came to America because slave trans like slave sellers were worried that black people could not survive on European food. No science back then, right? They thought that black people were different kinds of humans. So they looked at farm stuff, and you can't feed every animal the same thing. So that in case and and keep in mind of like how expensive a human being is, right? So what they essentially what they were worried about is that they were gonna bring them over and they were gonna feed them potatoes, and they were all gonna die of malnutrition, and so they a lot of people had they they brought food stores with them. And a lot of the thing, like watermelon, is from Africa. Um real yams, like sweet potatoes and yams are different. Yams are giant, but like real yams are from Africa.

SPEAKER_00 12:31

Now I just want sweet potatoes.

SPEAKER_01 12:33

Most of the rice that we associate with American rice is African rice, jolif rice, like the varieties that make jolif rice. Um because jolif is like a grade and also a way that you make rice, like, but so many things.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

Like, I nod at the microphone like they can hear me. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 12:51

No, but it's amazing. We watched the whole show, me and Emily when we were on we were on vacation one time, and we watched this show about like the history of food in America, and so much of it was West African food. I believe that. Yeah. It's it's it was really wild. I was like, damn. So like all the basically if you're southern, all the food you grew up with. Yeah. Like basically, like greens, all that is yeah, it's it's really incredible, but but uh collar greens with bacon ins and pieces. Yep. Yep. Man, now I'm hungry.

SPEAKER_00 13:25

We gotta stop talking about that. But that was like a butcher's green tea. That's how we got here.

SPEAKER_01 13:29

Green tea.

SPEAKER_00 13:30

We've been talking about matcha. We were uh his his My Seaster was uh was talking about uh an Earl Grey matcha, and then and then the conversation began, okay, but like what else could we matcha five?

SPEAKER_01 13:43

Yeah, because I I imagine a few of them wouldn't be good like that because they would they would be um English breakfast tea would not it'd be crazy bitter.

SPEAKER_00 13:53

That it that already has a lot of tannins in it, like that is a very specific flavor. Um unless like Yorkshire Gold specifically seems to be like the one that I have found that is like tolerable, just straight. Like I don't I don't really need a lot of sugar and I don't need cream with it. I do take it with cream and sugar. I am a hummingbird, but uh I I imagine that that that might be like the one exception that could be matcha. But Earl Grey, hell yeah. Especially um, who is it, twinnings? Uh does Lady Lady Grey Earl Grey tea? Ooh, I bet that'd be good.

SPEAKER_01 14:28

Wasn't the actual Lady Grey named Katherine?

SPEAKER_00 14:32

Like I wasn't gonna say it. You keep my government name out of your mouth.

SPEAKER_01 14:39

Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 14:40

My partner called me Katherine yesterday, and I just turned around and looked at him. I was like, excuse you.

SPEAKER_01 14:47

No, I would really like I would really like that. Like that would be really neat. I looked up because there's a matcha shortage, matcha's become so popular that they can't make it fast enough.

SPEAKER_00 14:58

Kind of like quinoa.

SPEAKER_01 15:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:00

And and what's going what's going on in Japan, especially quinoa for the longest time that I legit thought was Kinoa. I was like, I don't understand this word. And then somebody said it and I was like, what is that?

unknown 15:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Please explain this to me. Because I'm one of those people that I have no shame. If I don't know what a thing is, or if I do not understand, I'll be the first person to be like, educate me. Yeah. Please. It often makes me found sound kind of stupid, but like it's my personal opinion that if like you, if you're just nodding along, like, yeah, totally, I know exactly what you're talking about, and you don't, you are stupid.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

You're gonna make yourself look foolish at some point.

SPEAKER_00 15:37

Yeah, I got I got no qualms asking questions. But yeah, so I was I was corrected in a cloud of laughter that Konoa is incorrect. It is in fact in noir.

SPEAKER_01 15:50

Yeah. It's just they never put the accent marks on it.

SPEAKER_00 15:54

I was like no idea.

SPEAKER_01 15:55

For an aggressively French sounding food, there's never any accent marks over the word. And you're just like, how do you know?

SPEAKER_00 16:02

Like instructions unclear, word mispronounced.

SPEAKER_01 16:05

Yeah. I thought it was like when I first saw it, I was like, I have no idea where I thought it was like Middle Eastern, which apparently it kind of is, because couscous is very similar.

SPEAKER_00 16:15

I was literally just about to bring that up because then that's what I equated it to. I was like, is it just another flavor of couscous? I mean, what are we doing here?

SPEAKER_01 16:22

And then I'll you shared with me in a a thing. So I'm gonna share with you a thing. I thought for the longest time, and maybe it is, I don't know. I don't know where these foods come from, but I thought couscous was from South America for a long time.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

Really?

SPEAKER_01 16:36

Because of Cousco Pull the leather.

SPEAKER_00 16:42

Not from that lever.

SPEAKER_01 16:47

It was because of the the word. You know, it's just like, but it's not spelled the same. It's spelled very much different.

SPEAKER_00 16:54

Northwest Africa.

SPEAKER_01 16:56

Oh, there we go. We've got another one.

SPEAKER_00 16:59

Yet another one.

SPEAKER_01 17:00

Yeah. Yeah. It turns out like there are two places in the world where like food comes from. Yeah, like half of all life species on the planet live in the Amazon. And then like half of all foods can be directly tracked. Tracked to Africa because it's where everyone came from. So as they move around the world, they take these things with them. And it's why you have like dandelions in every country in the world.

SPEAKER_00 17:28

And they're delicious.

SPEAKER_01 17:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:29

I have to tattle on myself a little bit. I was feeling fighty the other day. And you know how I get when I'm like when I'm ready to throw down. So I got in the comments section on one of those videos about the origin of humanity, and you know, you know that's a war zone.

SPEAKER_01 17:48

Oh, there are people with some crazy ideas. And it's like, and the thing is, so many of them are almost there.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

You're so close to right, but you're dumb.

SPEAKER_01 17:59

Yeah. The people will be talking about it, and they were like, well, because they'll be debate debating, because the out of out of Africa theory is kind of old. Like it's thought now that like multiple kinds of humans lived, early humans lived, and most of these branches died out died out, but the predominant human human genome came from Africa. And then, like, you know, Neanderthals were largely around like Germany and stuff. And after a hundred thousand years, everybody just kind of blends together.

SPEAKER_00 18:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:26

And Ice Age had a lot to do with that. And you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 18:30

Like and these people were nomadic.

SPEAKER_01 18:32

Yeah. So everybody got around, and then now we're all pretty fucking the same. Yeah, like everybody's we have very, very, very minor differences. It's just like how much there's this graph of like how much melanin you produce, is that it's like shades of wheat, and it's like how close you are to the equator. That's pretty much it.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

Just saying.

SPEAKER_01 18:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:53

So yeah, I absolutely picked a fight in the comment section. I didn't expect the the other person to like be actively online. It popped back so fast, and I was like, Eee! Let's go.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

What was it about?

SPEAKER_00 19:07

The origins even. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:09

What were the what was their fine opinion, I assume?

SPEAKER_00 19:13

Christian.

SPEAKER_01 19:14

And that uh what that like white people were from Europe directly and no other ancestry.

SPEAKER_00 19:20

We're all God's children. We were created this way, evolution.

SPEAKER_01 19:24

Oh, okay. You're you're picking you've got a different fight going on. Yeah. But the the weird the yeah, the weird thing is if you're super big into the religious cosmology, a great deal of people on this earth believe that the origin of different skin tones is Babylon.

SPEAKER_00 19:44

I honestly.

SPEAKER_01 19:45

Well, it's because of the dumbass Tower of Babel story. Is that A, that to them, the Tower of Babel is Babylon. Never mind, that's not what's going on there. No, but also because of that story, and this is this was officially the LDS thing for a little while. Was that like the people who were at the top of the tower tower got the most of it? And that was how people described where black people came from for a little while. Like really crazy shit. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 20:19

I only vaguely remember the Tower of Babel like story, because my family was super fucking religious. So I was and like my uncle taught the youth group.

SPEAKER_01 20:30

Ah. So would you care for a refresher? Because it's very funny.

SPEAKER_00 20:35

I I okay, let me tell you what I remember.

SPEAKER_01 20:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:38

Before let me let so you can you can correct me as I go to see to see if I like misremember or anything. Hang on, I gotta sit up for this. Okay. I do not remember how it got started. I just remember that it was supposed to be one of those like tales of hubris.

SPEAKER_02 20:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:55

And it got too tall, they got too proud, and it had and it language was was the big thing. Like when it crumbled, nobody could understand each other anymore.

SPEAKER_01 21:06

That is the story. The original story has nothing to do with race at all because the concept of race didn't really exist.

SPEAKER_00 21:13

Yeah, because it was language.

SPEAKER_01 21:14

You're right. Language and culture are the things that divided humanity for most of human history.

SPEAKER_00 21:20

Well, that and to be fair, like the origin of you know, the text that would become the Bible, which has become the cornerstone to so many uh religions. I say that like I'm not a Christian.

SPEAKER_02 21:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:33

Let me just mock my own religion real quick. Nothing is sacred, everything is funny. Um but like it it it was a largely homogenous monoculture. Like it all came from one place that would eventually, you know, run into some other cultures, which were obviously touted as being the villains.

SPEAKER_01 21:59

Yeah, so they had. To explain the difference. Like, why are there if if if God created all of us, why are there a ton of other people?

SPEAKER_00 22:06

Yeah. And so Oh, they're all bad guys.

SPEAKER_01 22:09

Here's the here's the origins. Get ready because it's it's weirder than you remember it.

SPEAKER_00 22:15

I like I said, I only vaguely remember it. I was a child that was more interested in like reading ahead than listening to my uncle pontificate about the hubris of man.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

So there's you know the Noah in the Ark story, right? God floods the world, makes a rainbow to remind essentially himself not to do this again. And then also to show you that he won't, right? There's like this visual agreement in the sky that says I won't do this anymore.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

And there was a dove with the olive branch and forty days and forty nights on a boat.

SPEAKER_01 22:45

Yep. All that good stuff. So here's I'm telling I'm bringing this up to remind you that there is a bow in the sky.

SPEAKER_00 22:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

Nimrod, the king, who is not stupid, but is in fact a great warrior, an incredibly powerful. We say that because of Bugs Bunny. Like because Bugs Bunny would call people a Nimrod.

SPEAKER_03 23:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:08

He was calling Elmer Fudd a Nimrod to make fun of him because Nimrod was the greatest warrior on earth.

SPEAKER_00 23:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:14

Right? He was a hunter.

SPEAKER_00 23:15

So, like granted, this is the same rabbit that can never take that left-turned Albuquerque.

SPEAKER_01 23:20

Right. And the whole thing was to mock him, right? You'd be like, look at this bald-headed, like three-foot-tall white guy with a shotgun. He can't hit the broadside of a barn. He would call him Nimrod to mock him. And people in the 50s would understand that as a joke, right? So Nimrod, who uh became the king, built a tower to bend the bow of God. So he was building a tower to the sky to grab hold of the rainbow rainbow and shoot an arrow into heaven.

SPEAKER_00 23:52

Give him some lofty goals, Homeslice.

SPEAKER_01 23:55

Lofty goals.

SPEAKER_00 23:55

Please enjoy the stratosphere.

SPEAKER_01 23:57

Yeah. And so he goes, he goes up, and then and for the incredibly air the arrogance and the stupidity of this act, essentially the tale is about the mightiest man doing something and not even having a chance in the face of God.

SPEAKER_03 24:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:15

Right? That's the that's really what it's about. And then God confounds their language, as you remember in the story, uh, in order to keep this shit from happening again.

SPEAKER_00 24:24

And that's their No more common tongue.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

Yeah, that's their their that's their thing about that's the story of like to explain why there's so many languages. Um and of course that's not correct at all, but like but but there's uh especially in the area, there's already like five different languages.

SPEAKER_00 24:44

So on top of local dialects.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

Yeah. And then the one of the reasons why some of the stories get so odd is because you had, you know, as far as like who are they talking about here.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

Well, I mean, and if you want to talk about weird shit in biblical stories, you've got you've got bros living to be like five and six hundred years old.

SPEAKER_01 25:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

With like 13 wives.

SPEAKER_01 25:04

John, uh one of our friends, John, has a had a thing about this that I've never really looked into to see if it was true or not, like if scholars think that this is the case, but I thought it was a pretty good idea. And he said uh his belief is that it's about Jewish numerology. And Jewish numerology does go back really far in time, right? Esoteric numerology goes, there's even a book called Numbers, right? Like, so that does go back that far, and that so like the idea was that like instead of this guy living to be 800, Methuselah living to be you know, like 900 or whatever, it said that n the number of his years is whatever the number was. And I was like, you know, that's not a bad idea. It would make a lot more sense than people thinking that people lived that long. I was raised, because like, you know, there I the modern interpretation is that the further you are away from like the origins of of the Garden of Eden, the less time you live because you're essentially running out of divinity, you know, like and you're becoming more and more away from God, therefore dying. Uh, which is philosophically like from if if if you're wholeheartedly a hundred percent into like Jewish cosmology, that kind of makes a little sense. But like um but it doesn't necessarily explain the fact that there are no uh landmarks and such. And one of the I recently I learned something really cool about how what we know uh early Islam, like or rather Saudi Arabia and the areas around it were like before Islam, is that people used to write prayers on stones and leave them all over the place. So there's like these valleys where like like oceanic rock got pushed up and there's just these big like black stones where people would like take another piece of stone and scrape a prayer or cut a prayer and then cut like a warning. So it's like this is my name, here's my prayer, or this is my name to this God, here's my prayer. Don't remove this prayer, or else you'll your nuts will fall off. Or something, you know, like something like that, right?

SPEAKER_00 27:16

Honestly, that's a very human, like little little curse thing.

SPEAKER_01 27:20

Yeah, and and the the paths where a lot of these herders would meet up that are littered with these rocks, there's they're all over the place. And it speaks to a very, very um uh a polygod system where there's a lot of gods, but there's like one god on top, and this kind of like goes back into Semitic history because that's how Judaism was before Judaism was there's El, and then there's the Elohim, who are the children of El. Um and then sometimes those gods fight. Right? Like, so like that's kind of what happened. And then during the time where like Babylon and a lot of cities in Judea burn, the power gets um consolidated into like a couple of cities, and that's when you start having a central god, a central government, and that city is Jerusalem. So like before then there was like a big god and a big god's wife and a big bunch of their kids and all kinds of shit.

SPEAKER_00 28:18

That that that's an argument that's come up a lot recently, is uh release uh the uh on the on the pockets of the internet that I hang out on is uh the the whole god's wife is canon.

SPEAKER_01 28:30

It was for a very long time, it seems. It seems like there were probably temples because we have some archaeology that shows like two gods, uh one male and one female as being the chief gods. And some of these rocks in the valleys and stuff that have these markings on it talk about big gods, right? Sometimes it's like El and Bael and you know Baal, right? All these different entities from all over the uh Mediterranean and Middle East. It's super interesting stuff to to watch the like arrangement of of language and religion as it comes into focus and then eventually gets consolidated into the hands of like one guy.

SPEAKER_00 29:07

I always thought it was super interesting to watch like one religion kind of consume and assimilate with another one.

SPEAKER_02 29:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

I like we we had this discussion, I think, last week, um, about you know, uh various gods being and holidays being taken over by Christian stuff.

SPEAKER_01 29:23

Yeah. But you get that in like Norse religion too. Like there's the Aesir and the Vonir.

SPEAKER_00 29:28

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 29:29

They were probably gods of different areas. The the Vonir being the native gods, and then the Aesir being the gods of this new proto-like these proto-Norse as they're coming into Scandinavia and taking their gods with them, and then like syncretizing because they could not yeah, they they couldn't get they couldn't disrupt the religion that already exists. So in the sagas, they fight, they they have a row, and then at some point they go kind of like alright, peace treaty, and then they all start marrying each other's wives.

SPEAKER_00 30:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:00

To to show that they are one like connected family now.

SPEAKER_00 30:04

And then they still keep fighting, but they're all one family.

SPEAKER_01 30:06

Yeah, pretty much. But that's why like why the Norse gods kind of look, the Aesir and the Vonir kind of look different as far as like how they why Frey looks different than than Odin is because they are different kinds of beings.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

But Odin is married to Freya. Yeah. Also known as Frig, it's weird.

SPEAKER_01 30:23

It's a weird, yeah. There's different sagas show them as being twins, and then sometimes they're the female aspect of Frey.

SPEAKER_00 30:30

But like it's it's it's all very tyby-why me.

SPEAKER_01 30:35

Yeah. Turns out if if different cultures of people write the same story over like a thousand years, it starts moving around a little bit. It gets weird. Which I mean, even with a written language, even with oral tradition, culture, and all that stuff, it still floats a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 30:50

Yeah. Like I get And there's and there's always one person that's like gonna fanfic this out.

SPEAKER_01 30:54

Yes, a hundred percent. Like I always I get such a big kick of like people I know who love the show Vikings because I'm like, there's the stuff on the surface that's wrong, which is the times in general, uh, and the armor and everything else, but then you talk about like the Saxons, and when they come in contact with the Saxons who are like early Christians, and I was like, as they're moving through parts of this land, there are some people who, when they say Odin, are gonna know who you're talking about.

SPEAKER_00 31:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

Because they're your distant cousins, and before Christianity moved in, it was woe done and wotan for the Anglo-Saxon peoples.

SPEAKER_00 31:34

And it all means the wanderer.

SPEAKER_01 31:36

Yeah, they they have your your your languages are connected, your you know, everything is yeah, it's it's so it's it's such a neat little and if if you're not like the venerable bead, you know, you forget the history of the area.

SPEAKER_00 31:53

That's what you know what accusation finger.

SPEAKER_01 31:58

One of our episodes, I ended up clipping this out because I couldn't remember where it came from. We talked about the Easter thing, about like where uh Ostara.

SPEAKER_00 32:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:06

So where that comes from, I ended up looking it up.

SPEAKER_00 32:08

Fabulous, yes.

SPEAKER_01 32:10

Venerable Bede wrote it in one of his books about tradition before Christianity. It is the only source of that information.

SPEAKER_00 32:17

Really?

SPEAKER_01 32:17

So it might not, he might have literally just made it up.

SPEAKER_00 32:20

I told you, some of these people be fanfic and shit.

SPEAKER_01 32:22

Yeah, but we don't know. It might be that he simply misunderstood because remember, he wasn't traveling around, he was reading.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:29

And and writing people, and so like writing other monks.

SPEAKER_00 32:32

I also feel like that's a weirdly niche knowledge.

SPEAKER_01 32:35

It's so small, yeah, but it but I mean, all of our a lot of our knowledge of like quote unquote medieval England comes from Bede, right? So in his library and his Canterbury Tales and all that other you know.

SPEAKER_00 32:49

Canterbury Tales that were never finished.

SPEAKER_01 32:51

Yeah. There's so there's so much that that is that is compiled by Bede that we don't know. We don't know his sources. We don't know any of that shit.

SPEAKER_00 33:01

So pissed because I had to do a supplementary class, this sorry, Canterbury Tales done set me off. I had to do a supplementary class because I got super, super, super, super sick my junior year of high school. And um over the summer we were doing like reading, like advanced reading stuff. Um and they made us read the Canterbury Tales. Do you know how angry I was? I get to like the second half of the book and eight, not a single one of them finished.

SPEAKER_01 33:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:31

They all just stop.

SPEAKER_01 33:32

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 33:32

Mid-plot, and I'm just like, hello.

SPEAKER_01 33:34

So why it's it's like kind of problematic when people are like, well, he wrote them. I was like, we don't know that. Yeah, we probably he was compiling these stories in the same way that the Grimms brothers compiled. He was getting them from wandering bards, yep, and trying to piece them together in the same way you might interview a bunch of witnesses, you know, like in the I was so angry.

SPEAKER_00 33:55

Like I was little 16-year-old me sitting in this this what is essentially a summer school class, slapping this book down and going, I hated this.

SPEAKER_03 34:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:07

Let me give you my entire dissertation. Why? And the teacher that does not want to be there is just like, I don't care.

SPEAKER_01 34:14

Yeah. Right. I don't care that you. Oh, the Odyssey is subpar, you think?

SPEAKER_00 34:22

No, I fucking love the Odyssey.

SPEAKER_01 34:24

I knew so many people that hated that sort of thing. Why? Because it's super long.

SPEAKER_00 34:28

So?

SPEAKER_01 34:29

And it's super long and it's not in narrative, right? It's not like you're reading a modern book. It's written in like lyric poem. So like it's it's that whole it's kind of like reading the first bit of the Bible, or it's or or any part of the Bible. Yeah, it's a verse, right? People go like, and then he went here and he did this thing and he talked to this person because it's meant to be um sung in a way that is entertaining and told in a way that's entertaining.

SPEAKER_00 34:58

I I remember I remember being in school and most of my classmates having an issue having much of that same issue with Shakespeare. Like, not only because of how it is written, like the the structure and format of it, yeah, but also the language. Um, and I don't know, I guess I have a small brain mutation. I never had a problem with the language of it. Like I was just immediately translating it into like modern speak in my head.

SPEAKER_01 35:21

Yeah. I I didn't I didn't have a problem with that either. I didn't either. Sometimes he would make references that I didn't understand.

SPEAKER_00 35:29

Well, yeah, because they were they were referenced, they were supposed they were meant to be like pop culture references for the time. So of course that's not gonna make sense to us in you know 2000 and dick.

SPEAKER_01 35:38

Yeah, that was the first one I ever read. I think it was in middle school, and I just didn't quite understand some of the humor uh that that I had to read like notes about to get, but like Romeo and Juliet pretty straightforward. Yeah. Until you get to like, like, as long as you know what like a friar is and stuff. If you don't know that, you you might be very much in the woods.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

If you don't know what a friar is, you also clearly don't live in the south where there's lots of Catholic down here.

SPEAKER_01 36:05

That's what it is.

SPEAKER_00 36:06

Yeah, I was like, I understand like kids coming from like completely if a kid came from a completely non-religious background, like Yeah, but even then, like especially like you you have popular stories that also involve religious figures, like for example, Robin Hood. Everybody fucking knows Robin Hood.

SPEAKER_01 36:22

That's true.

SPEAKER_00 36:22

Friar Tuck.

SPEAKER_01 36:24

Yeah, you know he's a priest, or why why he's kind of fast and loose.

SPEAKER_00 36:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:30

That's the part I learned later was that friars weren't like full priests.

SPEAKER_00 36:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:33

That they had the ability to like go out and yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:36

They could be priesty, yeah, but they didn't have to be priestly.

SPEAKER_01 36:39

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:41

Ah, that was good, and I demand acknowledgements.

SPEAKER_01 36:46

I'm laughing.

SPEAKER_00 36:47

Hit me with sick hospital earlier. Fuck you.

SPEAKER_01 36:50

That's right. What did you say that made me say that though?

SPEAKER_00 36:52

Oh, I was complaining about like I I got hit with the AO3 curse this week.

SPEAKER_01 36:57

It's because someone said allegedly.

SPEAKER_00 36:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:59

Somebody was like, you were like allegedly, it was like must have been a sick uh because of the sick ostrich thing.

SPEAKER_00 37:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:06

Boots in the ginger for anybody who doesn't understand that.

SPEAKER_00 37:09

Letterkenny. Letterkinny, it's from Letterkenny.

SPEAKER_01 37:12

Must have been a sick ostrich.

SPEAKER_00 37:13

Uh fuck.

SPEAKER_01 37:16

Fucking excellent show. Yeah, seriously.

SPEAKER_00 37:18

If you if listen, listen, listen, listen, Linda. If you have never experienced Letterkenny, please do. Like, I I put up the hugest fight because I'm one of those little contrary people that like the more people tell me to watch something, the least likely I am to watch it. And I put up a great big fight about walk it watching Letterkenny. Like, wouldn't do it, wouldn't do it, wouldn't do it, wouldn't do it until like everybody came over to my house and then marathoned from season one to like season four.

SPEAKER_03 37:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:50

And so I I don't know. I sat down and started watching somewhere in the middle of it, and like I expected it to be the kind of humor that I don't particularly dig, because I don't I don't go after humorous shows. Like that's not that's not really my jam. Like, I'll watch something that is clever and funny occasionally, but like I'm usually there for the drama. Um I'll be the first to admit that shit. Uh but it it's it is it is so there there are there are some like I don't I don't want to say lowbrow that that feels insulting.

SPEAKER_01 38:24

No, but you were you are not a um what was that fuck the trailer park boys? You're not a trailer park boys person, yeah. Like that I'm not either. I tried to watch it. Bubbles was very funny. Outside of bubbles, it just made me angry.

SPEAKER_00 38:40

Or another another one that I was told that I would enjoy that I've never gotten around to watching is like Sunny in Philadelphia.

SPEAKER_01 38:46

That that's I like it. A lot of people don't. I you either like it or you it is one of those shows.

SPEAKER_00 38:51

I was informed that it was one of those shows that I would really, really, really enjoy, but I was informed to such a point where I will never fucking watch that show. Kind of like uh what was the the movie all about singing? Um sing?

unknown 39:04

No.

SPEAKER_00 39:05

Uh it the cups one? Yes.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

Uh with Anna Kendrick. Yes. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 39:11

I never watched it is eerie when you do that because like I literally I saw her in my head and immediately and like started hearing the song I got my ticket for the long way around. And then you immediately said it.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:23

It's weird when you do that.

SPEAKER_01 39:24

I don't know what it's called. I think it's called like I don't know. But I I karaoke or something. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 39:31

I don't I don't remember the name of the movie, the movies, because there's like four of them.

SPEAKER_01 39:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:36

Uh but I was told, because I I for those that don't know, I went to college on a choir scholarship, your girl got skills. Uh I was I was Broadway bound um and then never did it. So like everybody knows music is my thing, and they were like, Oh, you should watch these movies, you'll love them. Oh, you'll should watch these movies, you'll love them. We're gonna make you watch these movies, and I'm like, no. Just dead face, no interest.

SPEAKER_01 40:00

Will never happen.

SPEAKER_00 40:01

And then I watched them, and yeah, they're they're actually pretty cute.

SPEAKER_01 40:04

Yeah. I dude. I can't with some of this stuff. That the one, you know what a movie that I watched recently that did make me laugh, like out loud laugh a couple of times, and it was such a dumb movie. It's this old, it's called Samurai in Time.

SPEAKER_00 40:22

Oh yes!

SPEAKER_01 40:24

That shit was very funny and then got very serious.

SPEAKER_00 40:29

What was it?

SPEAKER_01 40:30

We all of a sudden, like, and you're just like, oh shit, I'm emotionally invested.

SPEAKER_00 40:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:34

And like crazy.

SPEAKER_00 40:36

Another movie that hits along those lines of like you go into it expecting stupid, and then like you, you're like, now I care. Um not Shaolin's soccer, that's the second one.

SPEAKER_01 40:50

Uh is it soccer related?

SPEAKER_00 40:54

No, they they changed just fuck. I cannot think of it. My brain refuses to brain.

SPEAKER_01 41:00

Just describe it for me. Maybe I'll know it. It's like a quiz show now.

SPEAKER_00 41:07

Seriously. That's the first one. It's the second one. I want the first one. It's probably like three well.

SPEAKER_01 41:17

Um it's probably like fucking uh uh Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon or something.

SPEAKER_00 41:24

It is not Crouching Tiger.

SPEAKER_01 41:25

I was like, no, that was a serious movie all the way through.

SPEAKER_00 41:27

It took me forever to watch that one.

SPEAKER_01 41:29

That's a masterpiece.

SPEAKER_00 41:30

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:30

It's like that's absolute masterpiece.

SPEAKER_00 41:33

I think one of the reasons that I what that I that it took me so long to I'm changing the subject entirely because I'm embarrassed that I cannot remember the name of this movie. It'll come to me at like three in the morning and I'm gonna text you. Uh I wasn't allowed to watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon when it came out.

SPEAKER_01 41:48

Because?

SPEAKER_00 41:49

Ah, weird religious family?

SPEAKER_01 41:52

Like I was I was also scared of Taoism.

SPEAKER_00 41:56

I don't know. This is this is listen, this is the same family that like threw a wall-eyed bitch fit when like my ADHDS was getting real big into like Greek and Egyptian mythology.

SPEAKER_01 42:05

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 42:06

And so they were like, you're not allowed to watch Hercules or Xena anymore either.

SPEAKER_01 42:10

It's not the ones I'd be worried about, but I mean like I do your thing. I I kind of get the Greek thing because people go pretty hard into uh like modern paganism through Greek through the Greek lens.

SPEAKER_00 42:22

Not a lot of and like Harry Potter made sense, quote unquote, made sense at the time too, because they were like, Witchcraft, the devil. Yeah. I read them at school. They couldn't stop me.

SPEAKER_01 42:34

Um they were everywhere. Couldn't not. I mean, they were everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 42:39

Yeah, and like so this this is the same family that like the the closest thing to watching like just standard TV. If my dad wasn't around, my father was in the Navy, so he was often gone. Um But like the closest thing to standard TV that I could watch would be fucking Veggie Tales.

SPEAKER_01 42:54

Yeah. Something that I never watched.

SPEAKER_00 42:58

It okay, to this day, Veggie Tales has like a very special place in my heart because I recognized even as a kid, like this is so stupid, but it's fun. This is like I get that you're trying. I I wasn't allowed to watch Spongebob either. And then like because SpongeBob hit what, like early 2000s?

SPEAKER_01 43:20

Yeah, it was because it was a little b after my time. Like after the time that I would have gotten into it. Like people who were watching it.

SPEAKER_00 43:29

So you and I did the exact same thing, kind of, except like my my my watching TV was super limited because like you know, various themes, like I wasn't allowed to watch Rugrats or anything. Uh-huh. Or the God help me The Simpsons were straight up off limits.

SPEAKER_01 43:42

The Simpsons, really.

SPEAKER_00 43:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:44

And Rin and Stimpy, I understood.

SPEAKER_00 43:46

Yeah, I wasn't interested in Ren and Stimpy either. Like I didn't like the animation style.

SPEAKER_01 43:50

Um there was a lot of shaved butts and tuping.

SPEAKER_00 43:54

But uh yeah, I it I wasn't allowed to watch a whole whole lot of stuff, and then by the Time that my parents were like, Alright, or rather, my mother, I guess I should say, she was nearing the end of her life and she didn't give a fuck anymore. Uh, she she was like, Alright, fine, you can watch whatever. And then, like, I would try to watch SpongeBob because all of the kids at school were talking about SpongeBob. I'm making myself sound a lot younger than I am. Um, but by the time that I tried to watch it, it just wasn't for me anymore, like it wasn't my brand of humor, and so I wasn't interested at all.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:28

Like Daria.

SPEAKER_01 44:30

Dude, Daria was great.

SPEAKER_00 44:31

Daria was amazing, and I absolutely watched that on the DL.

SPEAKER_01 44:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:35

Um, because if my mother had ever found out I was watching Daria.

SPEAKER_01 44:38

See, that one, I that one, like from the perspective of someone trying to guard their kids, I kind of understand because it was filled full of like modern philosophy. You know what I mean? Like low-key, but it was like Daria.

SPEAKER_00 44:51

That's what happened to me. Like, I wasn't allowed to watch any of the fun cartoons, but my ass definitely Daria was like there was two goths.

SPEAKER_01 44:59

Quinn was like an airhead. But she occasionally, yeah. She grows over the over the course of the show, and and Trent opens up and Daria becomes more like less concerned with him.

SPEAKER_00 45:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:12

You know what I mean? Like she steps into herself, kind of walks the because she starts off as like a 90s-era gung-ho feminist type, and then like gung-ho feminist grunge goth. Yeah, which was different for the time, and it exposed a lot of us to like ideas about those spaces.

SPEAKER_00 45:31

Starting to get ideas and thinking. I'm sure Disney I had unmitigated access to.

SPEAKER_01 45:37

Wild.

SPEAKER_00 45:39

If it had the Disney logo on it, it was unless it was the Hercules movie. I don't know why, but like my grandmother in particular had beef with the Hercules movie.

SPEAKER_01 45:49

All the imagery, I guess.

SPEAKER_00 45:52

Gods. Meg.

SPEAKER_01 45:54

Maybe she saw your reaction, Meg.

SPEAKER_00 45:58

Maybe that's why they took Xena away from me, too.

SPEAKER_01 46:00

Dude, I know for a fact that Zina, the Xena Gabrielle relationship was a lot of young women's awakening.

SPEAKER_00 46:09

I still step on me, mommy to Lucy Lawless.

SPEAKER_01 46:12

Yeah. Still. That whole thing was just like because a lot of the girls who watched the show liked Gabriella because she was like, you know, cute teeny blonde girl. And then that started kicking off, and they were like, maybe. You know what I mean? Like that was the whole thing around that.

SPEAKER_00 46:28

But like I had it bad for both Zina and Aries.

SPEAKER_01 46:33

Who was Kevin something? Kevin Smith. Kevin Smith.

SPEAKER_00 46:36

Who died on the set of Tears of the Sun.

SPEAKER_01 46:40

Really? Yep. I watched that movie. He was one of the soldiers, right?

SPEAKER_00 46:43

I don't remember. I just remember being like absolutely devastated and heartbroken about it.

SPEAKER_01 46:48

That's wild. Kevin, um, there's a different guy that that kind of fills in that for his kind of role that he used to fill. Like his because he looks a lot like him. He he's in Robin Hood. He played Little John in the uh Russell Crowe version of Robin Hood, which is phenomenal.

SPEAKER_00 47:06

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:07

But uh damn.

SPEAKER_00 47:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:10

Even though, like all Robin Hood things, not even remotely related to reality.

SPEAKER_00 47:14

There's a new one coming out, by the way. By the way, we went and saw uh The Mandalorian and Grogu this weekend aces. I I do I do not understand why it's getting such shit reviews.

SPEAKER_02 47:26

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 47:26

Everybody's pissed off at new Star Wars, and I don't know why. Because I like to quote my partner, I'm just happy like they're still making Star Wars.

SPEAKER_01 47:34

Yeah, that right.

SPEAKER_00 47:36

Every generation has to have their own Star Wars. Like our parents had the OG Star Wars, we had the prequels.

SPEAKER_02 47:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:44

And then like now all of the new kids are getting their Star Wars, and all of the oldies, with the exception of me, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 47:51

Are dismissing about it.

SPEAKER_00 47:53

Yes! And like I do, I okay, I'll I'm a mm. I'm gonna I'm gonna rein it in in just a second. I am enjoying that Hayden Christensen is like getting all the love he should have had in the first place.

SPEAKER_01 48:03

Yeah, it wasn't him, it was just the script.

SPEAKER_00 48:06

And it wasn't even that bad. It was they were trying to give you the origin story of fucking Darth Vader.

SPEAKER_01 48:12

Yeah. He's too too big.

SPEAKER_00 48:14

Darth Daddy issues himself.

SPEAKER_01 48:16

Like, do I think he was the right pick for that? I I actually don't. Like, I the reason why is because the you could tell in the movies that he struggled with the emotional side of looking like he was in pain. You know what I mean? Like to me, he's like he's really had it out in the third movie. Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 48:34

In the s in the in the second movie. The second movie where he came in, where he was still a young pup, he was still a little stiff, but it fit the character, in my opinion. Yeah, because as a writer. It fit his character because he was like what uh 17, 18 in the second movie. Like he wasn't, he wasn't let's see, in Clone Wars, he was about 21, 22. Yeah. So in in episode two, he was he was at that weird, almost grown, gawky stage that dudes hit. And if he gets married.

SPEAKER_01 49:09

Yeah. There, dude, there is there is a lot. The only thing that I think would have really sold that better, you needed more freak out scenes. Because the thing is like killing his killing his like mom around the death of his mother, that made too much sense. And also that those guys were legitimately all very evil and all people that the Jedi would have killed anyways. So it didn't really make wasn't it sand people? Yeah, it's been so long since I've seen it. She was bought as a slave and like worked to death, and it was kind of implied that there was a lot of SA. Yeah. Because of how he finds her.

SPEAKER_00 49:49

He finds her all b God, yeah. It's been a minute. Yeah, the episode episode two needed more of that like teenage angst in it.

SPEAKER_02 49:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:59

Because like Hayden could have played that shit up. Like he I've seen him in other stuff since since Star Wars, like when he was right about that age.

SPEAKER_02 50:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:09

He's got it. He had it. And I like I mad respect for you for retiring onto your farm and living in flannel, homie. Yeah. I love you. You're amazing. You will always be Anakin to me.

SPEAKER_01 50:19

Um, he was in Jumper, right?

SPEAKER_00 50:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 50:22

Yeah, great.

SPEAKER_00 50:22

He was in a whole bunch of stuff, and he has so much skill and so much talent. Unfortunately, they kept they wouldn't. I feel okay. Pause, regroup, start over. I feel like they didn't give him the opportunity to be a teenager within the script itself.

SPEAKER_03 50:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:43

Like I understand that he was a Padawan, a Jedi, and he was supposed to be, I am very passionate about this. And he was supposed to be very, like, you know, he's learning. He's not knighted yet. He's still, you know, Obi-Wan's student. He looks at Obi-Wan as a as a father figure. Obi-Wan looks at him as a little brother.

SPEAKER_02 51:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:00

There's there's the misstep miscommunication there happening. So, and on top of like he's uh he would he was too old to be inducted into the order. You have a child that needs fucking therapy. You you also first of all, take the child away from Obi-Wan and give him to Shock T.

SPEAKER_01 51:19

Exactly. It's either gonna be Shock T or Mace. I was like, he's either going to learn to absorb it or move with it.

SPEAKER_00 51:27

I will counter I will counter your mace window because I would have chosen, like if you were ever given a choice to be a Padawan to any of the masters, yeah, I would I would absolutely choose Mace Windu because he would be the only one that would make me shut up and listen.

SPEAKER_01 51:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:38

Um, but Plocoon would have been a good one for him too.

SPEAKER_01 51:42

Because of his adventurousness. Yeah, because he's so like he he very much enjoys life, you know, like yeah, like the And Kit Fisto would have been way too happy to have him.

SPEAKER_00 51:52

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:53

He needed that, he needs Sorry, that's who I was kind of. Oh, you were thinking I was thinking of Kit Fisto. Okay. I I don't know enough about Plocoon.

SPEAKER_00 51:59

Plocoon was Ahsoka's master before she transferred over to Anakin. So he's the guy with the goggles and the face mask.

SPEAKER_01 52:05

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:06

And uh his clone unit are are the wolf pack. And they like he's practically dad to all of they love him.

SPEAKER_01 52:12

Yeah, he's that's right. He's like the he's the one that you see in the council like with the younglings and stuff a lot. That like walking through the hallway in the movie.

SPEAKER_00 52:20

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:21

All right.

SPEAKER_00 52:24

I have mad respect for him. So someone who could have helped him, like, yeah, he needed he needed Shakti, who was all who was basically in charge of all of the clones. Like, like as soon as they found out about the all the horse shit going down on Camino, uh, Shakti was like dips and took off. And so all of the clones were with her. So she was teaching the the kid clones, like she was there with them. She would have been an excellent choice for young Anakin.

SPEAKER_01 52:48

And someone who would have actually taught him like strategy.

SPEAKER_00 52:52

Not to mention, she's a six foot six Tagruda. Yeah. When he gets out of hand, she could just go thump down.

SPEAKER_01 52:59

Right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:01

Instead, you gave him to traumatized Obi-Wan, who's barely 25 at this point. He's I I will give him props. He was one of the youngest Jedi masters ever. Yeah. I am such a nerd. Um he was literally the Soresu master.

SPEAKER_01 53:19

Like, but it's it's the life experience is the problem.

SPEAKER_00 53:23

This kid, kid, I say that. This man hit the ground running as a Padawan and never got the opportunity to stop.

SPEAKER_02 53:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:30

He's so traumatized, he just lost his master. He just fought a Sith Lord that's not supposed to exist.

SPEAKER_02 53:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:36

And now you've handed him a traumatized 10-year-old who is like yearning for his mother.

SPEAKER_01 53:42

When he's like young and coming into it in the first movie, because he's still very young in the first movie.

SPEAKER_00 53:46

Yes. He's he's 1920 in the first movie.

SPEAKER_01 53:49

He comes into a massive uh like a solar system-wide trade war.

SPEAKER_00 53:56

Yeah. Like he's he's with Qui-Gon at that point. Like he's still looking at him go, what do we do, Master? And Qui-Gon, the fucking hippie dippy.

SPEAKER_01 54:04

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 54:06

I fucking love Qui-Gon Jin. They were so fucking mismatched as a pair.

SPEAKER_01 54:12

Yeah. There's a lot of ways that I felt like, like, I know they have to move the story along, but it's one of those things that unless you write mistakes, you really can't have conflict later.

SPEAKER_00 54:25

Yes, and it drives me fucking crazy because it was like it is canon, a canon event across like all of the books that are no longer canon, the comics that are canon, and then just like the written shit that floats around on the internet that is canon, but like it's not anywhere official.

SPEAKER_01 54:41

Star Wars universe.

SPEAKER_00 54:42

Yeah, the star the the canon Star Wars universe. It is it is canon for a Padawan to start with one teacher and then like you know, as they grow and learn and mature, and like and that master to go, okay, you've learned all you can from me, I'm gonna hand you to my buddy, and he's gonna finish you out.

SPEAKER_01 54:58

Yeah. But I mean, imagine imagine in that story, right?

SPEAKER_00 55:02

We got here for green tea, bro.

SPEAKER_01 55:04

Well, they did copy a lot of old Japanese movies in the first.

SPEAKER_00 55:08

That's true. Although, the have you watched the Maul series yet?

SPEAKER_01 55:11

No.

SPEAKER_00 55:11

You should, it's good. It's only eight episodes long. But there's a tea ceremony in the middle of it. That's crazy with Maul, and I'm just like, look at you.

SPEAKER_01 55:19

That is acknowledging though, because like uh Kurosawa and and um Akira Kurosawa and Lucas were like friends.

SPEAKER_00 55:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:25

Like he he consulted on some Kurosawa movies.

SPEAKER_00 55:29

Look at the fashion alone for the Jedi.

SPEAKER_01 55:32

They're straight up wearing like desert clothes with um with like desert clothes. They're doing kendo.

SPEAKER_00 55:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:40

They're sword fighting in the first movies. The first, the sword fighting, the way that they like come down through the center line like that and get into a ready position. I'm like somebody's somebody's about to like announce this with a fan here in a moment. This fight is way Japanese. And then um, yeah, a lot of the a lot of it is just kind of like Middle Eastern slash Asian slash uh cowboy western slash knights.

SPEAKER_00 56:06

Having having made Jedi robes now, and also like having done various like cosplay things, like historical cosplay things. So, you know, kimono, yakura, yeah, hakama pants.

SPEAKER_01 56:19

Which is all the underside of the Jedi stuff.

SPEAKER_00 56:22

That's exactly what it is.

SPEAKER_01 56:23

Yeah, it's it's it it's a Middle Eastern overcoat with yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:27

Fuck, man.

SPEAKER_01 56:28

Japanese clothes.

SPEAKER_00 56:29

Home slice.

SPEAKER_01 56:29

Yeah, space samurais.

SPEAKER_00 56:32

I got handed the Jedi pattern and I was like, I don't need this. Just showed him all of my shit for a head from the uh getting old, guys.

SPEAKER_01 56:42

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 56:43

Um things go fucking Kenshin, Raroni Kenshin.

SPEAKER_01 56:49

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:50

Raroni Kenshin, samurai shampoo. Like, I have all of these. I sew, by the way, for those of you that don't know, um, I have just stacks and stacks and stacks of patterns for like cosplay shit and historical uh his costuming.

unknown 57:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 57:07

Ronikenshin. Ronin Kenshin always cracks me up, and then I I think this is probably around time to wrap this up.

SPEAKER_00 57:13

My fucking brain spat out Samurai X, and I was like, no.

SPEAKER_01 57:16

That's wrong, Ronan Kenshin. I know, but it's the wrong one. The good one. Oh man, with a violent one. Um what always cracks me up about gold eyes is yeah, the demon look is always crazy. But the uh the the translation, the English translation, he's just speaking like he's supposed to be speaking like comedically, but they they make him sound like he's soft in the head. Where he's like, it's a nice day, it is, it is, like that, and he talks like that over and over again, and it's like he's supposed to be playing up his innocence.

SPEAKER_00 57:50

Yeah, he's supposed to sound like he's very he's so he's supposed to sound like a soft boy, not soft in the head.

SPEAKER_01 57:57

Right.

SPEAKER_00 57:57

He's not supposed to sound like an idiot, he's supposed to be, you know, very demure. Yeah, he's very mindful.

SPEAKER_01 58:06

Look at how he holds his sakabato, very demure.

SPEAKER_00 58:10

There's a there's a we have some of the weirdest internet touchstones.

unknown 58:16

Fuck.

SPEAKER_01 58:16

But it's like it they always some of it the way he talks is just a direct translation from Japanese where he's just like to the castle I am going is just the sentence structure of Japanese.

SPEAKER_00 58:32

It's okay to do that.

SPEAKER_01 58:33

Like meanwhile, everybody else is I wonder how he's doing today. And that's it. I was like, why'd y'all make him sound weird?

SPEAKER_00 58:40

What was it? What was I watching? I was watching one of the animes that you told me about, and somebody, I I had the subtitles on because I'm one of those people that like occasionally my brain, like if I look away from the screen while they're talking, it goes from perfectly good dialogue to this do I look away and I don't know what what's happening?

SPEAKER_01 58:58

Like that TikTok video of he used to work with his father and he looked at like that, and he's like, What head snaps up?

SPEAKER_00 59:06

Yes. So I keep the subtitles on, and I've I've noticed that uh on some of them, like the the sentence that the subtitle says, which is the translation of the Japanese, yeah, will be very, very different from the sentence that gets said in English, but the gist is the same.

SPEAKER_01 59:24

Right.

SPEAKER_00 59:24

And I love that shit.

SPEAKER_01 59:26

Where they they're trying to culturally translate.

SPEAKER_00 59:28

Yeah, they're bringing it over. Which I I appreciate.

SPEAKER_01 59:32

That is nice because sometimes it doesn't make any sense in the direct Yeah. Like because it should say like every time somebody comes into a room, they are saying literally, I'm coming in.

SPEAKER_03 59:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 59:44

And so it makes it look in English, it makes it look almost like they're not knocking or being or they're being rude, because they open a door and they're like, I'm coming in, and then they just come in. But that is the polite way to Japanese. Yeah, like so it's like you're now you yeah, it doesn't always translate well.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:01

I uh that and like there there are some cultural things that like just don't make sense over here in the West.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:07

Yeah. And thought of putting fingers and butts. Talking about that that the the game. The game thing, the the the goose bite, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:17

Yeah. Shit. Uh fuck. I don't have from green tea all the way back to anime. Yeah, that's right. With the long, you know, we didn't do 40k this episode. I'm proud of us. It always fucking comes back to 40k.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:30

I don't I don't think there is a um a a a samurai person. Primark? Yeah, there's not a I don't think there's a Primarch that's I mean, there's plenty of names. There's tons of names that sound vaguely East Asian.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:45

Uh no, I didn't try. I wasn't trying to segue in to fucking 40k. I was just mentioning that we didn't crack any 40k jokes.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:55

That's true. Anyways, on to the show. Right?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:58

We should, we should, we should do the thing that we actually came here to do. We're wrapping up bullshitting.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:03

We're I I posted our first one yesterday.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:06

The uh the the pre-show?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:08

Yeah, you know what happened? It did not, so we we've had several weeks of that show because last week it did not post it. And then I posted it and we got 10 downloads almost immediately. So yay us.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:19

Hi guys.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:21

All right.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:22

We're so happy to have you.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:23

We will be right back with actual shows.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:27

We'll be right back.